How one party photographer helped stupefy the Internet


Full disclosure: I had absolutely no idea who KirillWasHere was until this weekend.

And frankly, I wish my friend Becca Lemire never tweeted at him, but I’m kind of glad she did. Now I know what scum looks like.

Kirill runs a website akin to Last Night’s Party or The Cobra Snake—a concept so dated, it actually surprises me that there are women out there who are willing to show off their tits for a “champagne facial.” A champagne facial is exactly what it sounds like: Kirill will simulate a cum facial with champagne, as long as you lean and crush your tits together for a photograph. Are people that hard up for alcohol on a night out that this seems like a totally normal sacrifice?

Dear women, why are you doing this?

My problem with this person is his Twitter bio, wherein he acknowledges that he likes to make fun of “fat chicks.” Cool story, bro. Kirill is the Dane Cook of party photographers, and as far as I can tell, he panders to an American population that still thinks a strand of Mardi Gras beads is a sufficient gift to fuck on camera. His followers, who admittedly seem devout, are no better than the man himself. After criticizing him for making fun of fat chicks, Kirill suggested I sew up my vagina and grow some balls. His followers responded by suggesting that the only way I can and should feel the way I do is if I’m a “faggot” or “dating a fat chick.” With a little probing, I’m certain Kirill would expose that these fan views are also his own.

I’ve made my stance on ‘faggot’ being used as a pejorative very clear, and if I wasn’t gay, I fail to see how dating someone who is fat would somehow make my views any less valid. Where is the appeal in this brand of backward-thinking, bad boy nostalgia? When Sterling Archer speaks in his machismo-fueled anger, it is comical, because there’s a considerable distance from reality. With Kirill, this is a real person, somehow getting women to shake their tits for a little champagne. Ladies, you’re worth considerably more than that.

Below is a sampling of the Kirill fan backlash:

[View the story “KirillWasHere’s fans strike back” on Storify]


  1. jimmy

    you are such a clown lol , first off relax its not that serious second its waaay better then sitting and bitching to the internet how someone else is an asshole ( trust me it wont help yo u get laid ) and 3rd off all no such thing as bad press remember that the 10 people that did read this are probably more into his idea then anything you have to offer

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