Seth MacFarlane played the on-stage Republican who wants to prove to everyone that he can actually sing. No, really, actually sing.
Quvenzhané Wallis (I copied and pasted this from the Internet) played the cute never-gonna-win-at-9 kid seat. Not when Anne Hathaway was in a movie for five minutes once. She had to cut her hair, kid. Deal with it.
Sandra Bullock was a goddess as usual, and even hammed for GIFportunities. BECAUSE SHE IS THE BEST.
Meryl Streep picked out a wedge on live television. BECAUSE SHE IS THE BEST.
Jennifer Lawrence fell on her face, proving she’s still realer than real or something.
Catherine Zeta-Jones performed a number from movie musical Chicago, because we have all been wondering when we were going to pop in the DVD copy we snagged at that yard sale last summer.
The cast of Chicago presented several awards, and were actually introduced as the cast of Chicago. Chicago, a movie that came out 11 years ago.
John Travolta came out on stage to introduce a montage of old musicals. Which, again, included Chicago.